Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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