last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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