he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
