Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
You brought string cheese to the strip club
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
