So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
