Apparently you make a good broom.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
as a side note pls kill me
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Randomize
