im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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