Where is the hickey?
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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