Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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