I look better un-naked...
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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