But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
