I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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