That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
