What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize