I got chris browned last night
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
