On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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