you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i was born a porn star she said
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New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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