This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I think my fart just growled at me.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
