How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
This is my gift to your gina
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize