: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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