I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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