So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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