That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Randomize
