In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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