I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
