no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
