At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
