i need an iv and a liver transplant
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
We talked him into tasing himself.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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