Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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