i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
