The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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