So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize