I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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