i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
