So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Randomize
