So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Randomize
