If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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