At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.