new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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