btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
