do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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