You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
