i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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