would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
then he tried to convert me to islam
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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