I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize