just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Everclear isn't food dammit
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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