Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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