You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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