trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize