I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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