how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
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Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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