Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
